"How was I to know that Microsoft PowerPoint would

turn out to be the Pentagon's most effective weapon

in the war against truth, justice, and the American Way?"

In a daring daylight raid, aerialists from Apple Corp., shouting

"Steve Jobs Rules!" have stolen the Windows logo from Microsoft

headquarters in Redmond, Washington.

Secretary of State Rice was

puzzled when her robust

critique of Microsoft Jakarta

failed to interest the

Indonesian parliament.