"There is no doubt in my mind," said President Bush,

"when history is written, the final page will say:

Victory in Iraq was achieved by the United States

of America for the good of the world."

B-1 Bomber Dusting Iraqi Crops

Just before a plagiarizer wearing explosives blew himself up

Wednesday at a checkpoint in the city of Baqouba that was

manned by Sunni Muslims allied with U.S. forces, he was

heard to say, "I regret that I have but one life to give

for my country."

Did you know 'Corpse Harvesting' now constitutes 50% of

Iraq's GDP? 'Corpse Planting' constitutes the other half.

"OK, Nancy, I won't say that you 'completely capitulated'

on the war funding bill. I'll just say you 'caved'."

Rip Van Winkle awakened after a 4,000-year nap only to

discover people in the Middle East were still killing each other.

He is now trying to go back to sleep, so far unsuccessfully.

"So which is it, Senator McConnell: are you saying

the lives of full-time professional soldiers are worth

less than the lives of draftees, or are you saying that

draftees aren't full-time professional soldiers?"

"Yep, another one of those war-addled chickenhawks.

Ship it to Iraq!"

Secretary Gates and General Petraeus Walking

the Green Zone Mile in Baghdad

Iraqi Woman Arrested for Failing the White Glove Test

"And that's when I told Charlie Rose I was opposed

to holding the pre-war Iraq vote just ahead of the

2002 elections. You should have seen the look on

his face!"

Baghdad Suicide Car Bomber Kills Twelve, Wounds 30;

Driver Yells "Surge Is Working, Surge Is Working!"

Before Blowing Himself Up

Iraqi Insurgent Auditions for Lead Role in

Attack of the Bride Monster

2007, the Bloodiest Year So Far in Iraq

2007, the Bloodiest Year So Far in Afghanistan

2007, the Year the Price of Oil Hit an All-Time High

2007, the Year the Price of Blood Hit an All-Time Low

SSSSHHHHHHH ... Don't Tell Anyone: Al Qaeda Has

Been Routed in Baghdad; FBI Now Warns Al Qaeda May

Have Relocated to Shopping Malls in LA, Chicago, Just

in Time for Christmas

President Nicolas Sarkozy of France was greeted with

cheers and standing ovations today, a sign that France

was forgiven for being wise in opposing the American-led

war in Iraq.

Trick-or-Treater Shows Up Early on Condi's Doorstep

Blackwater Contractors Undergoing

'Cultural Awareness Training'

"Neighbor, when was the last time you had a big steaming

bowl of Neocon Brand Chili? Well, that's too long!"

Bill Kristol Having a Wargasm