Willi Chevalier, Hirsutomane

Osama bin Laden Announces Six-Figure Endorsement Contract with

Just for Men Brush-In Color Gel for Mustache, Beard & Sideburns

When Oilcan Harry twirled his moustache,

Mighty Mouse didn't lose his cool.

But when Willi Chevalier twirled his,Mighty Mouse broke into a cold sweat.

Graduates of the University of Leipzig's Renowned

Beard Management Program, Class of 2007

Some say a beard is a sign of manliness. But it could

also be a sign of poverty (i. e., too poor to shave),

a sign of sloth (i. e., too lazy to shave), a sign of

incompetence (i. e., too uneducated to shave), a

sign of anal retentiveness (i. e., too possessive to

shave), a sign of maturity (i. e., too wise to shave),

or a sign of thriftiness (i. .e, too tight to shave).

So which is it, O Bearded Ones?

And the Bearded Ones replied: "We have nobetter reason to grow a beard than doesFearguth. And what might that be?"

Willi Chevalier of Germany is a world champion

in the 'freestyle beard' category. Next year, he plans

to enter the more difficult 'backstroke beard' competition.

Why is it that fake Democrats insist

on wearing such scrofulous beards?

Take Joe Klein, for instance.