"Over here, the tale is called 'Little Black Riding Hood',

there are no wolves, and the last fairy was beheaded

right after the British left."

England's Parliament Gets Its Clock Cleaned

Tiger Woods to Be Named Honorary Member of the

British Government's Ministry of Silly Walks

Foreign Secretary Jack Straw said

he was confident that even if she

never became President of the United

States, Secretary of State Rice would

be canonized as St. Condi, in recognition

of her missionary zeal in democratizing

the British Isles.

Secretary of State Rice realized too

late she shouldn't have criticized

the British for using bad grammar.