Joe Klein could blame his deficiencies as a journalist on the

fact that his wife, Victoria, is a witch. But we all know that

belief in witches began to go out of fashion in the 18th century.

So, it seems Joe will have to find a more modern excuse, like,

for instance, "I write for Time magazine."

Charles Krauthammer is so ingenious he has figured out

a way for both the white pieces and the black pieces to

lose in a game of one-man chess. Every time he plays,

in other words, he's a two-time loser.

Priscilla Painton, a Deputy Managing Editor at Time,

is responsible for giving the imprimatur to Joe Klein's

falsifications. Her boss is Richard Stengel, whose

specialty is the 'inculpable noncorrection'.

"Some people believe I'm Rick Stengel, Time's Managing

Editor, but some people don't. As a paragon of journalistic

objectivity, that's all I can say."

Time Sued for Journalistic Malpractice;

Editor Denies Magazine Practices Journalism

Meet Michael Skube. He has written an Op-Ed for a major newspaper

criticizing Talking Points Memo, a blog he's never laid eyes on. He

is a professor of journalism. He teaches his students the same skills.

"Some have suggested I shave my head. Were I to do that,

hundreds of journalists would be thrown out of work overnight."

Mark Halperin, late of The Note, says, "I don't mind if

people blog -- but they should apply high standards of

journalism." If they don't (or won't), he adds: "The best

solution is for serious consumers of news to write letters

to the editor." Asked what writing instrument these

consumers of news should use, he says he favors the

Conway Stewart Limited Edition Plymouth Pilgrims

Fountain Pen (street price: $1,869).