If your son were to walk in one day and say, "I've decided

what I want to be when I grow up: I want to be just like

John Boehner," what would you say?

"I only look brown. Underneath, I'm whiter than

Wonder Bread, and the only Mexican words I know

are Frito Bandito."

"It's time for my midmorning snack, Mitch.

Don't worry, you won't feel a thing."

House Minority Leader John Boehner says 3,780 dead American

soldiers is a 'small price' to pay to keep his tanning salon safe

from attack by Al-Qaeda.

“The despicable attack MoveOn.org launched against Saint

Petraeus today should be condemned by all Members of Congress,

including the Democratic leadership. I urge Members on both

sides of the aisle to join in support of this resolution so the House

speaks with one voice rejecting the truth-telling tactics

employed by this group which represents what a majority

of the American people believe.”

John Boehner Lands Lead Role in Remake of The Crying Game