Senator David Vitter Recognized for Owning the Largest

Used Condom Collection in Louisiana

Paul Schum, a Bardstown, Kentucky Catholic high school

principal, has been cited for loitering for the purpose of

prostitution while he was wearing an all-black leather

outfit with fishnet stockings and a pair of fake women's

breasts. In his defense, the Archdiocese of Louisville

says at least the principal wasn't molesting children.

Senator Vitter admits he started hanging out with a lioness

from DC and a tigress from New Orleans only after his wife

started dressing like a leopardess from Louisiana.

When you enter the Technicolor Dreamcoat District,

the only limit is your own imagination.

State Representative Bob Allen (R-FL) says that his arrest

for solicitation to commit prostitution was the result of

a 'misunderstanding'. "The undercover cop said I offered

to give him a blow job for $20. He must've mistaken me for

an illegal immigrant if he thought I worked that cheap."

Senator David Vitter (R-LA) claims his name was on the D.C.

Madam's phone list because he had been doing undercover

work to expose illegal immigrants disguised as sex workers.