The Unexpurgated Bible #7

"But the day of the Lord will come as a thief in the night;

in the which the heavens shall pass away with a great

noise, and the elements shall melt with fervent heat,

the earth also and the works that are therein shall be

burned up. But many bloggers won't notice it, for they

will have taken the weekend off."

"Gosh! My end is nearer than I thought!"

"Joey, you eat chicken wings like there's no tomorrow.

Do you know something the rest of us don't?"

The Eschaton began when Jehovah started opening theUniverse like a Ziploc Bag.

Asked if he believed that the war in

Iraq and the rise of terrorism are

signs of the Apocalypse, the President

said that before he could answer this question,

he would have to discuss it with his

Secretary of Eschatology.