U. S. Decisively Outflags Japan

Observers say Shinzo Abe was forced to resign as prime

minister because his Phil Silvers and Buddy Hackett

impressions were such big bombs they reminded the

Japanese too much of Hiroshima and Nagasaki.

"World War II's over, Hiroshi. You can come out now."

Kotooshu Throws Kotoshogiko in Dohyō,

or

Friday Night Smackdown at Benihana

Kansei the Robot frowns when he hears the word 'bomb', smiles at

'sushi', and grits his teeth when someone says 'President Bush'.

No doubt about it. It's Mika Kano, whose latest hit is

'Osusowake - Purupurun no kyu no bon', a song whose

title translates into English as 'Wobbly Tits, Tiny Waist

and Bouncy Hips, Let's Share Them All Around'.

Big Babies Coaching Little Babies in Baby Crying Contest

Apparently there is no bag limit on flying fish in Japan.

At the time of his apprehension, the Japanese construction

worker had 4,400 pieces of burgled women's underwear in

his possession. Asked what his motive was, the thief said,

"It's unmentionable."