In a suit, Chris Matthews looks like Fibber McGee.

In a dress, he looks like Molly.

Russ Knocke, the Department of Homeland Security press

secretary who investigated the fake FEMA press conference,

has concluded that FEMA officials did not intend to

deceive the public. "We were just reliving our childhood

days when we listened to Let's Pretend on the radio," he said.

The Day Froggy the Gremlin Got Canned

Do not ask Al Gore if he is kin to The Great Gildersleeve.

"Oh shit! What does Superman do in a situation like this?

Hmmm. Now I remember. He says, 'Up, up, and away!'"

Believe it or not, this Sumo exercise is called 'Froggy the Gremlin

Plunks His Magic Twanger and Waits for Smilin' Ed to Let Buster

Brown Out of the Shoe to Take Tige for a Walk'.