South Korean Protester Arrested for

Uncovering Unsightly Bellybutton

"Sticks and stones can break my bones,

but names will never hurt me. So quit

hitting me with those sticks and start

calling me names!"

Trick-or-Treater Shows Up Early on Condi's Doorstep

"Good morning to you,

Good morning to you,

Good morning, dear teacher,

Good morning to you!"

Burma's Military Junta Cites Legal Opinions of

Alberto Gonzales to Justify Crackdown on Protesters

No matter how often and how loudly he shouted, "Shazam!"

Bhili Bhatson still didn't turn into Captain Marvel.

The Radicalization of Miss Piggy

"This is no 'summit'! The altitude here is only 118 feet!"

"Didn't I see you in Aeon Flux?"

An essential ingredient of all tasteful and discriminating

South Korean protests is a timely application of

Arrid Extra Dry Spray.

"More teeth! I demand more teeth!"

"Somebody get this starving protester a

Ten-Piece Bucket of Extra Crispy. And fast!"

Kashmiri Rock Imports Jump 33% in Second Quarter

Kashmiri Hurler Signs with the Atlanta Braves

"Oh won't you put that down and take me, I'm yours

When will we have this chance again

Oh please just put that down and take me, I'm yours."

She claimed to be a suicide bomber, so she couldn't

understand why no one took her seriously.

"Yes, I'm exiting from the antiwar stage. But don't you think

for a moment Cindy Sheehan wasn't one of the pioneers

who helped lead America up from the lowland of war

toward the highland of peace. Got that, Bushlicker?"

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"Tires for sale, tires for sale! Get 'em while they're hot!"

Anti-Immigration Protester Deported for

Apostrophe Smuggling