"I'm gonna wash that Mitt right outta my hair!"

Things to Avoid #13

Rickshaw Pullers Who Enjoy Singing in the Rain

Define Paris Hilton in Ten Words or Less.

"A Hank of Hair and a Piece of Bone."

Even Rupert Murdoch knows it's the

17th Day of Zappadan.

"Hard to believe, Heather, but it's already the

16th Day of Zappadan."

"Out of my way, mortals! I'm in a hurry to

get to Day 15 of Zappadan!"

After he had endorsed St. McCain for President,

the Last Honest Man thrilled to Toby Keith's

rendition of 'Drink to Me Only with Thine Eyes'.

On Day 14, Tej Kaur, age 90, says: "There is only

ONE Zappadan! Accept no substitutes!"

"I'm gonna keep on walkin'

keep on talkin'

walkin' into freedom land!"

If you saw this sign on the road to the Thirteenth

Day of Zappadan, you took a wrong turn.

When you hear the Alphorn Quintet playing 'Disco Boy',

you know it is the eve of the Twelfth Day of Zappadan.

"Before I go under for the third time, I wanted to

call and remind you it's Zappadan, Day 11."

Follow this guy and, before you know it, you

will be celebrating Day 10 of Zappadan.

How to Play 'Chopsticks' without a Piano

If you are a pilgrim on your way to the Ninth Day of

Zappadan, just follow the signs.

"Why can't we all just get along, little dogie?"

Drudgery Report #3

Being Meat Loaf's dietitian would be drudgery.

Day Eight of Zappadan is straight ahead.

Watch your step as you exit the bar and

don't forget to leave a tip.

On the eve of the Fourth Day of Zappadan, RAQ whipped

up some dragon lotion for their version of 'Dirty Love'.

Zappadan: Day Three

Fearguth Shows Up with an Old Book