CIA Faulted for Giving Bad Intelligence to Britney Spears'

Sister Regarding the Ins and Outs of Pregnancy

The Two Faces of Lindsey Graham

"The Army Field Manual as a one-stop shop to guide the way we handle lawful combatants and enemy combatants is absolutely necessary if for no other reason than to protect our own troops.... [I]f you want to torture people, the Army Field Manual says no and the President says no. It is now time for Congress to say no."

October 5, 2005

"I think quite frankly applying the Army field manual to the CIA would be ill-advised and would destroy a program that I think is lawful and helps the country."

December 14, 2007

"There has also been a collective failure to recognize the problem

of the abuse of interrogation-enhancing drugs by the CIA."

The Potrzebie Prize #3

President Bush Applauded for Being the Only Senior Official

in Washington with No Knowledge of the CIA Torture Tapes

Rogue Bull Walrus Calls Report on Iran 'Quasi-Putsch'

"Gold tie, diamond-studded cufflinks, manicured nails,

expertly-trimmed beard. You may be a hard-nosed

sonofabitch when it comes to torturing people, Mr. Rizzo,

but you're the most nattily dressed nominee to come before

this Committee in a month of Sundays."

Ratso got all huffy when someone asked if he was

related to John Rizzo, the Acting General Counsel

for the CIA.

"Hey Rizzo, you any kin to Ratso?"

"And then I took those wascal CIA torture tapes

and cwushed them in my bare hands!"

"Would you mind explaining how the Halfway

House for Neoconservatives ended up here, in

the middle of the NIE Railroad track?"

Reduced to tears by the National Intelligence Estimate,

Mahmoud Ahmadinejad now suspects U. S. intelligence

agencies are conspiring to undermine his presidency.

"Senior intelligence officials were wrong about Iraq

having WMD in 2003, so they're probably wrong about

Iran not having WMD in 2007. It's called a Catch-43."

The Washington Post reports that the government

of the United States will spend over $50 billion in 2007 for

spooks who work for the CIA, DIA, FBI, NSA, and BIR.

Happy Halloween, Everybody!

After repeated waterboardings by the CIA, Boston's David Ortiz

confessed yesterday that he was a fan of the Los Angeles Angels

and that he only hits home runs to show his solidarity with

Al-Qaida.

American Empire #13

Clandestine Operations

Elmer Fudd Says Wascal Wabbit Plotting Fwesh Attacks on

the United States Aimed at Sowing Death and Destwuction

"You must understand that not all voters are created equal.

Mr. al-Maliki was only elected by the Iraqi people. I am being

elected by U. S. Senators and the CIA."

Robert Novak is at it again. This time he has outed

Peter Potamus, an underwater CIA operative.

“When I finally got my hands on the Fourth Amendment, Senator Durbin, I tore it limb from limb!”

"Hmmmm," the President mused, "maybe I should garotte

this sumbitch while I have the chance."