Three Visions of Paradise

Christian

Muslim

Orangutan

Hillary Clinton Accused of 'Pulling a Huckabee' for

Her Use of Subliminal Christian Symbolism

Tony Snow Enlists Short People at Oklahoma Christian

University to Defend the Almighty in “The Second War in

This Country, the War on God”

The Unexpurgated Bible #3

Jesus said: "And I will give unto thee the Keyes of the kingdom

of heaven. Oops! Did I just say 'Keyes'? Dadgummit, I meant

to say 'Cleese'. Oh well, nobody's perfect!"

"Remember, America, God has chosen us to be a peculiar

people. And the most peculiar thing you can do in 2008

is to put me in the White House!"

Sad Episcopalians Vote to Secede from Gay Episcopalians

If someone asks why you're not a Mormon,

just say two words: "Mitt Romney."

"Did you know that more than 1,000 professional studies

in the past 30 years all connect TV programming with

excessively violent and promiscuous sexual behavior

in young people? Why, the situation today is almost as bad

as it was when I was fornicating with Ann-Margret in

State Fair back in 1962. Surely you don't want to see a

return of the 1960s, do you? So please fill out Pat Boone's TV

Decency Survey today!"

Giant Jack Mounted Atop St. John's Church in Baghdad;

Gigantic Red Rubber Ball to Be Installed Next

Where Modern-Day Disciples of John the Baptist

Buy Their Helmets

“By the way, I’m not Episcopalian. I’m Baptist. So, if you

don't mind, call me John the Baptist from now on.”

"Listen, Christian, I'm supposed to smite you on the

right cheek first, then the left!"

Jesus Takes Wrong Turn, Runs into

Dead End on the Via Desperatio

Young Christian Enters Guinness Book of World

Records for Number of Times She's Been Born Again

When Jesus saw the cross hanging from Ann Coulter's

neck, He realized He had died in vain and vowed to

never come again.

Javier Solana, Secretary-General of the European Union, is

seeking a restraining order against the Star of Bethlehem,

which, he claims, has been stalking him ever since he made

a flippant remark about the Baby Jesus.

As the Son of God inched along, he thought:

"Jesus H. Christ, I am so sick of rush-hour traffic!"

"Osama bin Laden believes," says Dinesh D'Souza, "that the United

States represents the pagan depravity that Muslims have a duty to

resist. I have to agree with him on this point, because I, too, as a

devout Christian, have a duty to resist pagan depravity. And, what,

you ask, is 'pagan depravity'? Well, it all boils down to sex: abortion

rights, condoms for unmarried girls, and liberalized laws regarding

homosexuality. Don't you see how this caused the destruction of the

World Trade Center on September 11, 2001? Isn't it as plain and

simple as the sweater I'm wearing?"

How many Christians stopped being

Christians when they realized Paul

Coughlin had stopped being a

"Christian nice guy?"